We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Randomize
