She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering