I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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