bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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