I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Randomize
