My girlfriend figured out who you are.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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