I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
