i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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