so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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