Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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