We're like a lot better than the average bears
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
