he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
