I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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