she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize