I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
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The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
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I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.