Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
