It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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