The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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