when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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