I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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