there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
