just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Randomize