these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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