NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
