He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Randomize
