Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
