there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
