I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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