i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
