No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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