Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Randomize
