My brain says no but my pants say off.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Panties = found
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
