I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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