I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
