would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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