dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize