wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
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