Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Randomize