The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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