I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
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