Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
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I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
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In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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