nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
