It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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