why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize