you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Randomize
