break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
honey bunches of taint.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
