I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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