I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
