I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
