i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
