I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize